Grant Me The Mercy
by lazypadawan
Summary: Defeated, bloodied, and broken, the Supreme Leader of the First Order seeks only release from his Angel of Death-the woman he loves.


Grant Me The Mercy

The Supreme Leader's plans for the galaxy were in ashes. He took in the flaming, smoldering ruins around him. He breathed in the odor of death and destruction. Overhead, X-Wings streaked across iron gray skies. Everything he'd worked for was gone and the only thought he could gather in his miasma of emotions was, _It's my fault, I did all of this. It's all because of me_. Millions dead, scores of systems in ruins. Was this what he wanted for a legacy? He felt as though his insides were being crushed, his soul falling apart like shards of shattered glass.

Drowning in shame and remorse, Kylo Ren stood alone, bloodied, bruised, and his clothing torn. His hair was a sweat-soaked mess. His men were all dead. The explosion had destroyed his lightsaber. He still had the Force but otherwise, no weapon. It was only a matter of time before Resistance forces would find him but he would not try to run or hide. There was no escape anyway.

A slight grim smile pulled at his dry, cracked lips when he felt _her_ coming near. Ah, his Angel of Death would find him first. She had felt his presence and it was drawing her to him like a beacon. Soon, he saw her slim athletic form stepping over rubble, her lightsaber hilt in her right hand. The expression on her lovely face was calm but concern and wariness emanated from her being. That incredible energy created any time they were together surged through him. They locked gazes and seemed to breathe as one. _This_ is what he should've chosen, not something as cheap or as fleeting as power. It was too late now. Soon he will lose this too.

"Rey," he sighed with resignation as she stood inches from him. "It's over," he said, gesturing helplessly. "You've won."

"Ben," she began.

"I see it now, for what it's worth. I've let my pain and suffering become the whole galaxy's pain and suffering. And for what?" His voice cracked. "All I've done my whole life is cause pain. Forgiveness is too much to ask now." He grabbed her right wrist and gently but firmly pulled it up so that her lightsaber was aimed directly at his heart. "End it all now. You were right, they were all right: my parents, my uncle. I am a monster and you cannot let a monster live. Just grant me the mercy of dying now, at the hand of my equal, my most worthy opponent, the woman I love, instead of an execution droid or a Rebel firing squad. Let your face be the last thing I see." Tears flowed down his filthy cheeks. He saw himself in her arms as his life ebbed away, feeling her warmth as his body grew cold. He wouldn't know whether his soul was bound for the netherworld of the Force or on eternity in dark chaos but dying in her arms would be as close to a paradise beyond he could ever hope to have. He swallowed hard as he stared at her impassive expression. Her hazel eyes pooled with emotion.

"No," she finally said, tossing aside her lightsaber. He recoiled as though she'd punched him in the gut. She would turn him over then to the Resistance for torture, imprisonment, a show trial, and a humiliating public execution. _Oh do you hate me so much to do this to me?_ He started to reach with his left hand toward the discarded lightsaber, planning to call it into his grip and commit the deed himself.

"I don't hate you, Ben," she said. "I want you to come with me."

He blinked with shock. "Don't be naïve! I know what your friends will do. The Resistance will kill me!"

"I swear no harm will come to you. They will have to kill me too." Still in shock, he dropped his left arm back to his side. He knew through their bond there was no duplicity, no trap.

"Why do you want me now?" he said.

"It takes great courage to sacrifice one's life for the greater good. It can also take great courage to live even in the face of despair, shame, and guilt. And I want you to live. We're bound together, you and I. The two of us have a destiny to fulfill. We can do great things. I promise I will never leave your side again. I love you, Ben. I have ever since that night I spoke to you in the hut. Come with me, and live." She held out her hand to him.

He knew he didn't deserve this. He knew he didn't deserve her. But he realized in that moment, as sun broke through the clouds in the sky, he was also tired. Tired of fighting. Tired of anger, hurt, despair, and conflict. What did he have to lose now by being with the one he loved?

He took a deep breath, then clasped her hand in his own. She then pulled him into her arms, holding him tight. He reached around her shoulders and squeezed, burying his face in her hair. He felt his spirits soar and for the first time in his life, he finally felt free.


End file.
